4 Misconceptions about Masturbation: Only Singles Masturbate? Does prolonged masturbation reduce sexual sensitivity?

Women’s masturbation is still often stigmatized today… This article dispels the 4 misconceptions and provides different paths and “masturbation menus” for you to find your favorite sexual satisfaction! One day, we can all say out loud, “I masturbate, I enjoy it, I’m normal and I’m healthy!

Stigmatized Female Masturbation

As a heterosexual woman, whenever I tell my friends that I use “small toys” when I’m single, they always give me an “I get it” look and smile:

“No matter how good it is, it’s not as good as a real person. Either that, or you’ve never met a real person, and that’s what a real sex life is all about! Go find a boyfriend!”

But… why is sex with a man the only thing that counts as “real sex”? What is so inferior about other sexual behaviors and my little toy?

Wikipedia explains Human Sexual Behavior:

Human Sexual Behavior

The sexual behavior engaged in by a human individual in any experience and expression of sexuality, as well as the ways in which the body expresses, behaves, feels, and interacts with sexual desire. Human beings engage in a wide variety of sexual activities, some of which can be accomplished alone (e.g., masturbation) or with the participation of others (e.g., sexual intercourse, non-penetrative sex, oral sex, etc.); the narrower definition of sexual behavior refers to sexual intercourse.

Reference: Wikipedia

In other words, all sexually stimulating behaviors, whether masturbation, sexual intercourse, or borderline sex, are sexual behaviors, and there is no hierarchy between them.

“There is no hierarchy, and only sex with the opposite sex that has normal sexual function is ‘real sex’” – the underlying logic of this standard is a common offense to both singles and married couples.

In turn, this standard induces a wider range of sexual anxieties. One of the best examples of this is the misperception that single women masturbate:

Misconception #1:

Masturbation is a “no-choice” form of sexual fulfillment, and if given the choice, most people would have intercourse…?

Truth #1:

Masturbation is not a “spare tire” among all sexual behaviors. In a survey on female masturbation, 94% of respondents with a partner still masturbate – after all, in most cases, we know our bodies better than anyone else, and we know how to please ourselves. If that’s the case, why not?

Misconception two:

Only singles masturbate, and sex with a partner is the ultimate pleasure…?

Truth #2:

It’s true that women do have some great sexual experiences with other people. However, the survey results show that less than 20% of women are able to achieve orgasm from penile stimulation of the vagina alone (and orgasm and sexual pleasure are not exactly the same thing, as we’ll explain later); in contrast, most women are able to achieve sexual pleasure during masturbation.

In addition, as we mentioned above, masturbation can help women become more aware of their bodies and their sexuality, so for those of us who are in a sexual partnership, masturbation can also help us improve the quality of our sex lives. It’s an irreplaceable form of sexual exploration, not just a “second best” option for singles.

Misconception Three:

Prolonged masturbation reduces sexual sensitivity…?

Truth #3:

It’s true that women who masturbate more often take longer to have an orgasm, but it’s not because our sex organs are less sensitive – it’s in our brains.

Because masturbation is aided by the use of pornographic pictures and images, when the brain remembers such stimuli, the neurochemicals in the brain form new patterns and what used to be pleasurable to us is no longer pleasurable (Loosemore, 2021).

However, this process is not irreversible. By stopping watching pornography for a period of time, our sensitivity can return. In the meantime, we can also try to enhance our desires in as gentle a way as possible.

Misconception Four:

Masturbation makes your body worse…?

Truth 4:

Many people who try to stop masturbating say that they feel weak after masturbation, or that their endocrine system is out of whack. However, there is no evidence to suggest that masturbation causes endocrine disorders in women, and it does not affect ovarian secretion or ovulation.

Masturbation itself is not harmful (Kendall, 2013; Friedman, 2017). However, if you masturbate when you’re already tired or uncomfortable, or if you try to rely on masturbation to relieve stress when you’re already under a lot of pressure, it can indeed lead to discomfort – after all, you’re likely to feel tired from any kind of exercise at this point!

Of course! We’re not here to discredit other forms of sexual behavior, but we’re here to make a case for single women who masturbate. It’s perfectly normal that some women are more likely to get off on masturbation, and some women are more likely to get off on intercourse.